Dr. Stephen R. Covey’s book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, published in 1989, has sold over 15 million copies and has been translated into in 38 languages worldwide. The book remains one of the best-selling nonfiction business books. In August 2011, Time listed "Seven Habits" as one of “The 25 Most Influential Business Management Books.”  Additionally, President Bill Clinton even invited Dr. Covey to counsel him on how to infuse the philosophy of the book into helping him with his role of President of the United States of America. Obviously, this amazing book certainly has merit! (Stephen passed away in 2012.) 

About a year after "Seven Habits" landed in bookstores, the hype and reviews aroused my interest, so I purchased a copy. After reading it (three times), I was stimulated and passionate to dig deeper into Covey’s philosophy, which, in essence (to me), assists in greatly enhancing the performance capability of employees by employing the “golden rule”: i.e., “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

After embracing the book, I was fortunate to have my local agency (I was a Police Chief in North Carolina) sponsor sending me to the 32-hour "Seven Habits" basic course, which essentially provided greater insight into the book. Following my completing the course, the local community college (where I taught management and criminal justice to college students) sponsored my attendance at the 40-hour "Seven Habits" “Facilitator” (Instructor) course, which certified me to teach this paradigm: boy, was I pumped up with this entire incredible mental model of dealing with people and employees. 

This article will briefly outline what I consider one of the most important segments of the "Seven Habits" philosophy: The Emotional Bank Account — which can be employed in our personal setting (home life/family) and/or within our place of employment. 

We all know what a financial bank account is. We make deposits into it and build up a reserve from which we can make withdrawals when we need to. An Emotional Bank Account is a metaphor that describes the amount of trust that has been built up in a relationship. It is the feeling of safety you have with another human being. If you make deposits into an Emotional Bank Account (of another person) through showing courtesy and kindness, being loyal to them when they are not present, apologizing when you offend them (or make a “withdrawal”), clarifying your expectations,  and keeping commitments and promises, you will build up a reserve. Your trust toward others becomes higher, and you can call upon that trust many times if you need to. You can even make mistakes, and that trust level (that emotional reserve) will compensate for it. 

But if you have a habit of showing discourtesy, disrespect, cutting off others, overreaction, ignoring others, becoming arbitrary, betraying their trust, threatening them,... eventually your Emotional Bank Account will be overdrawn. The trust level will get incredibly low: it will go into the red. Others may not even wish to associate with you.                     

Some of Covey’s pertinent adages that solidify the emotional bank account are as follows: “Keeping a commitment or promise is a major deposit, breaking one is a major withdrawal.”  “Trust is like fine China; once shattered, it is almost impossible to piece together.” 

A summary of the emotional bank account follows: 

Five Major Deposits that Build the Emotional Bank Account 

Showing kindness and courtesy 

Loyalty to the absent. (Not talking unkindly about someone else out of his or her presence. By being loyal to those not present, you build trust in those that are present.) 

Apologizing sincerely when you make a “withdrawal.”  

Clarifying expectations. 

Keeping promises/commitments. 

Final outcome: Try employing the principles of the emotional bank account, and you will see a definite enhancement in relationships with others (our friends, loved ones, and colleagues).  

Advice: Consider reading and embracing the book: "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" — it will unquestionably be an uplifting experience.