World Series spit fest


Ol’ Dutch has never been much of a watcher of sports either live or on television. I am of the old adage that if I cannot play, I don’t want to watch, either. That holds true for other things like cooking shows, home remodeling and kissing. I mean honestly people. If you feel the need for the latter, get a room and spare me the details.

But this past week. I suddenly got a whole new interest in watching the World Series of baseball otherwise known as the second-only-to-golf most boring sport to watch.

I am not sure why I began to watch it although Miss Trixie being a Texan and a Texas team participating meant it was going to be on the tube, so I watched, too.

All in all, it's been a pretty good run and lots of home runs and more than average excitement which normally is akin to watching grass grow. And in fact, in years past, I swear I have watched the grass grow on the outfield just to get some action.

In game five, the Houston Astros did rally quite impressively to come back from an early four-run deficit to extend the Series. We did miss the scoring inning as we were driving home from the trunk or treat at the grand’s church. But there are enough reruns of plays to catch a fellow up on that part if you wait long enough in the broadcast for another boring streak which is sure to manifest itself sooner than later.

One thing I really noticed this time around in my sports watching career was the amount of spit flying around the dugout and on the field. I guess with the COVID thing Ol’ Dutch had become somewhat sensitive to the emittance of vapors, sputum and coughs that emanate from people’s mouths and so I began to wonder how they were getting by with this in today’s anti-expectorate world.

I mean honestly, we have been warned and threatened and even ordered to vaccinate up and mask up to the point of being ridiculous. One thing we do notice more and more is some people are immune to such orders or advice and the hypocrisy of that is starting to get old.

Now personally, I do not mind the player spraying spit all over hell’s half acre, the equipment, fans and each other but I did begin to think about who actually cleans up after each spit fest. That has to be a nasty job replete with gobs of snot, dirt, phlegm, bubble gum and tobacco mixed together like some witch's brew of the Dark Ages. Ugh.

Regardless of your opinion about the mask mandates and or vaccination effectiveness, this display on national TV of blatant spewing is a poor example of what to do in the midst of a pandemic.

Watching the game made me wonder also just how much these guys spit as it seemed to me that no matter when a close-up of a player was shown they were either mid or post spit. I am beginning to wonder if in fact the players are given a cue to let-er-rip when the cameras are focused on them as it's just too regular to be happenstance.

Just like anything else a person sees around him or her, there is always something to learn from every experience in life. And what Ol’ Dutch came away from watching the World Series is that baseball is so boring that even COVID has no interest in it. Has to be that or just another case of selective enforcement which we see the rich and famous and politicians live by daily. You see, rules are just for the little guys and made by the big guys.

I don't know about you but Ol’ Dutch is going to get out there and do some of his own spitting now that it's been shown to be non-threatening. And it can't come a moment too soon as I have been holding back over a year on that activity and it's starting to back up on me.

Kevin Kirkpatrick and his Yorkie, Cooper, fish, hunt, ATV or hike daily. His email is Additional news can be found at